After all sort of relationship and troubles, I tend take it as lesson now. I'm so afraid to get into such complicated trouble again. So now I prefer to make clear the line at beginning instead of leaving it and pretending I know nothing.

Actually, I quite amaze with those who accepted what I wish the relationship to be. And yes, we still friends although sometimes it's seems odd. But really, don't you think credit should give to them who still keep you as friend instead of avoiding you after the line is drawn? I really look up with those friends and it really shows how gentleman are them.

Jazzie is craving for Josh Groban. haha!

He like totally physically fit my dream guy! :p I like guys with nature curl hairs. It looks soo adorable to me and decent look with alto voice.. lala~~

The only thing that cheer my mood by watching him singing!

Seriously, you won't believe tons of to-do list needed to be done.

1. writing letter to postpone my studies for college as I going to do internship
2. writing letter to MARA to postpone funding me.
3. writing essay for scholarship application.
4. 2 weeks from final exam which I got so many thing yet to cover.
5. make a call on Monday to MRSM, asking them to delivery my SPM cert.
6. make a call tomorrow to Mr. Chen, asking him for red creasent's cert
7. forced to read some of the chapters from previous sem subject as my friend begging me to teach her for repeating her paper. (Like, there is no lecturers at all in college! And force me come on days that I have no classes on the day)

That's all in my mind now. I guess still a lot that I have not list down.

Jazzie is going to do her intern in Petronas.. lala~~~~

Applied it like 2 months ago!! Thought I didn't get it!! OMG!

Jazzie is going to audit Petronas' account!!

(not really audit, I'm only intern! but still ... lala~~)

Sooo cute!!! Ellen Degeneras kept entering in the wrong key! haha.. But she looked soo cute!And sooo funny when Josh Groban was,"turn around, turn around!" hahaha!!

YES, I LOVE MY LIFE NOW!

If you happen to read this,

I LOVE YOU!!!

don't turn around.

I said you!!

yes!

I LOVE YOU!!

You make my life colourful.

Thank you!

In the mood of Josh Groban!!!

You're still you!!

I got the most expensive birthday present ever from my brother and his girlfreind. And it was late because it needs to order first. It's written there, made in Spain. hmm.. or China? haha.

Koko, if you soo nice to read my blog.

THANK YOU!!

I LOVE YOUR GF MORE :P

OMG! haha.. Now, I'm happy.

For the the time I wasted online instead of study finally paid off.

Only god how many emails I sent to universities and colleges asking for information on ACCA. Yes, I cried at one point after knowing that 90% of them did not provide full time course as for UK, ACCA usually for degree holders and working people. My heart totally broken that my senior suggested the only way is taking degree first. But this is not my plan! Somehow, I know the god loves me! hehehe

I guess this will be my last post about going abroad. I guess my readers got quite boring with this, right? XD

And secondly, I got accepted by Petronas for internship from Jan 2010 to June 2010. Mostly, I will be doing audit which I never learn it before but the person who called me up managed to convince me that audit it just about calculating provision for tax and stuff like that. oh ya! Now, what she said make sense. She was talking about internal auditing and I was thinking about external auditing! haha. Now, only I realised. See, is good to blog! :D

Thirdly, I'm okay with my baby. And Steph, again, got superb irritated with me. Fine lor, next time I don't want find you. I will tell you when I successfully delivery a superb adorable baby,ok? :p And you're definitely not going to be her godmom! oh! your creepy hands :P

Now, I can happily study because everything works according to plan.

And I'm sooo love my life now. Don't you?

I'm sooo blue today! And Kenny, not the blue ok!

[Random]

I was soo excited and unbelievable that actually Malaysia has "Sex" shop which the next day,

Jaz: you know hor! I got dildo pressie from my friend!

H: who? who? wanna see!!

Jaz: later I show you ok?

Next hour

H: wei.. I wanna see lar.. I never see b4!!

Jaz: OMG!! you really believe that.

And I need half and hour the convince that I didn't receive any of it! WTF =.=

So now what?? Am I that hamsap or people think that my friends are hamsap?

He went to Calbury's factory in Birmingham without me!!! Hate you!!! OMG!! it's soo like small disneyland inside!!! haha!

And still I'm blue :( wtf =.=

Tomorrow it's someone birthday!!!

I wanted to dedicate her loooooog post but seriously I don't what to say as I wrote her a superb long letter last year for her birthday about our friendship. Still, Steph, you want to hear I repeat again? hehe.

She indeed an amazing friend because she's born in November! November's child is always smart, pretty and tall. Right, Steph? hehe.. *ahem*cough* serious now. oh ya! reminder: Prepare a box of tissue before you read it :D

Sometimes, you know.. I do wonder why and how on earth you can stand my behaviour. I get moody easily and-as-you-know-my bad-attitudes. But, you seldom complain and do you? Like SW quoted, backstab? XD

But, I missed you a lot. I miss the time you helped me with studies. The time we make cookies, muffins and cake together. The time you slept over at my house. And forever I remember your ahem hand! hahaha! I will make sure if I have kids, I will warn them, "don't see this aunty very pretty and kind, beware of her creepy hands!" XD

And the time we owned the fitting room. The typical yet fun activites with bestie! I promise you if I get to fly to UK next year, I will buy you Karen Millen's gown for your 21st birthday! (I need time to save monies aslo.. designer's always expensive)

I missed all the moment and I hope we still able to do all this although we are getting old, married, having kids.

Because, you always always my bestie.

and my own version of HERMIONE!!

I LOVE YOU!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, HERMIONE!! :D

MUAKZ!

P.S: I still keep all the letters too :D

haha.. No wonder I can't find my course in UCAS! I should apply thru UKPass!

I'm now consider a postgraduate! wah!! sounds so brilliant now...

:p

give me brat for while cannot meh! XD

p.S: Khay Ling turned her hubby to real Malaysian now!! He speaks "la!!" haha :p

For what I need to be nice? For what I need to stand up for friends when they are nothing at all when I desperately need them.

People said I mean. To me, honesty is what friends need the most. But, I do learnt lessons that my honesty could hurt someone's feeling. And indeed, I changed and I started to protect friends whenever they need. And what I got? Betrayal.

Then, why I need to be kind? My heart bleeding even worse than breaking with boyfriend.

I swear never never again trust on friends. Friend means nothing to me at all!

All I need is myself. Hence, stop crying and stand up for yourself because there is always no one for you.

As Hanz said, why should I care? If I'm keep having the fist fight, I'm just as childish as him. So, there is no reason for me to waste time on it, right? As long as I keep ignore it.

And same thing to what happened yesterday after reading someone's blog. Why should I get bad mood on it?

Afterall, human are meant to be alone.

Yes, I'm alone. Always

Jazzie really need to work hard. This is her final semester!!!

I still remember the thought we had during family dinner. If I go UK by next year, I will graduate 2013 if I didn't fail any of the papers. And so do my brother in Russia and my eldest bro who now planning to take his master in US and grad in the same year too.

Then, my parents will be sooo busy in that year that they need to travel around the world to just attend their children's convo!

Yes, as Steph said, I keep blogging on going to UK. Indeed, I'm happy and excited. First CAT is superb hard enough to pass since it's express course to be exempted first 3 papers of ACCA. Then, I go to UK by scholarship which superb hard to get too although I aim for MARA. But still MARA only sponsor 1 or 2 students for ACCA in UK. Worst was, none of students got the scholarship last year. It's easier to apply Bank Negara than MARA.

The fact that people said," ya la, you Malay! of course la MARA sponsor you" and denied the efforts we put out. Did we said," of course la, your family soo rich. simply apply any private university aslo can lar! sure accepted, as long as you got money"?

Hence, I'm lucky born to be Malay and you lucky to be born rich. Okay?

Jazzie is so glad to have this person coaches me how to apply scholarship and university in UK. He's so superb nice that he kept explaining the study and working permit that I had no clue at all during online chat that he ended up got so irritated and promised to call me yesterday. But he forgot since he's packed with all studies and ended up call me middle of night( which evening there). And this morning I realised I have one missed cal which the number is superb long. And was surprised that he insisted to call me!!! So touched!

I think because of him, I'm feel more confident that I will get scholarship and fly to UK by next year. And show all the selfish people that instead of you arguing and writing letters in secretly, it's basically useless! And the lesson taught me that whatever strategies and ways you have, keep silent! It's not worth it for you to give tips to these selfish people. So, I successfully convinced people in my college that I will pursue my ACCA in UITM.

And if Willie, you happen to read this post. Please.. zip your mouth ok? :D